At last, after months of preparation and planning, the Retreat for Z5Pauls finally successfully done. Thanks to our COO, GAs, parents, of course Z5Pauls ourselves who have worked hard to make this a reality.

Pictures coming up soon...

My office PC is down now, of all the time, it chose this time to 'sleep' for only God knows how long. I really need it right now. The Retreat things are there and all company's major files are in there.
I still don't understand how and why it happened, I remember it was ok before I gone back home on Wednesday...
Whatever it is, I pray that it will get well soon...please. I'm not used to boss's PC because the keyboard is so hard to tekan...

Language and Me

I took the JLPT Level 1 test last Sunday. I think I got 40% chance of passing but it's not the result I matter most, it's the studying part that's important to me. Before the test begun, I 'forced' myself to study for it by doing lot's of exercises and watching lot's of Japanese dramas. Though I don't have a good memory to store up all the information I learnt for the pass few weeks, I actually enjoyed the part of getting to know the language and culture more.

I love to listen to the Japanese conversations because they could speak the same thing to different people in different words. They have different way of talking to teachers/bosses/parents/seniors and friends/juniors/younger brothers/younger sisters, I'm still wondering how they could remember when to say what to who. To me, I'm still confused and I always mix the casual and formal words together when I speak.

I don't really like to go for Japanese classes here actually, especially when it has a big group because I don't feel that I'm learning. I remember I couldn't take the advance class anymore because the class had grown triple in size, I felt there's competition in class and we often had to 'fight' to get attention from our teacher. To me, I didn't like competition at all, even till now.

To me, the best way to learn a language is to learn the culture first. Languages are not just theory-based because they need lots of practice and exercise in order to encourage our mind and mouth to speak using these tools. Most importantly, when we are thinking of learning a language, we must ask ourselves this: why do we want to learn this language? And I don't think the answer: because I just want to learn it la, is a good answer.

I remember I learnt Mandarin, because my parents forced me too and I had to eventually speak the language because I was in a Mandarin school and 90% of them were speaking Mandarin to me (the 10% are Malay and English teachers le). Then, I forced myself to speak cantonese in secondary school because that was what most of my classmate were using to communicate, again the environment and peer pressure forced me to adapt and learn something new. Needless to say, I had to learn to speak Japanese when I was in Japan because of the same reason. This I must thank one of my host family, Fuji san because during the one-month summer period I stayed with them, they really forced me hard in speaking Japanese.

So next time when we want to really learn a new language, make sure there's someone forcing you. It works for me!

I have been thinking...

• What will happen to me in five years time?
• Will I be able to further my studies soon?
• Will I be able to reach my goal?
• Am I dreaming to big?
• Why I'm so not so good in communicating with people?
• Why I always feel so lonely in a group?
• Why I'm not good enough in sports?
• Why am not good enough in everything I studied and studying?
• Why nobody understands me, even my own family?
• Why I'm the black sheep in my family?
• People run away when they see I'm facing problem, even my family,why?
• Am I going to stay single for long because I'm not so good in maintaining a relationship?
• Will I ever get married?
• Will I ever have kids?
• Will I ever found my prince charming?
• Do I love God?
• Am I actually reading a the bible when I'm holding it and reading? (because I always forget what I read)
• I believe God is my best friend (He's the only friend I have anyway), or do I not believing it?
• Why God is putting me in such situation?
• Why this happening and that happening?...

Haihz...been thinking too much...it's bad for my mind and body...I just have to write it down, at least now I feel much much better.

Thanks to the Acid Attack, the teachers and students are afraid to go to school. Some were daring enough to go but were late, have been told that the class was cancelled yesterday.

This is Unfair!

Two schoolgirls blinded in acid attack in Afghanistan while they were on the way to school. The Talibans still think that girls have no rights to study. This is absurd! Their selfish thinking really disgusting and destroying these innocent girls' dreams for the sake of their family, country and themselves and their physical appearance, just plain evil.

It's a tragedy for the girls that has possibly broken their hope in studying for better future and their hope to get married is 95% impossible because you-know-why.

I pray for all Afghanistan's women to never lose hope and faith in studying even when they have to work way much harder than men and I pray for the world to realised how serious is this matter and that all who have human hearts would stand up for these women and protect them.

Stuck

Feeling stuck, not able to move out the box. Wanna break free and soar like the eagle...to see the world and find the true purpose of living.